I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
