Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
