That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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