sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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