this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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