try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
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