youre lurking in front of me
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize