Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
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