My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
