I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
