he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize