Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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