i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
