Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
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