My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
