awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
