It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
