do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Randomize
