When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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