she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
