dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I fill condoms, not promises.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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