On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
