don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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