i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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