What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
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