Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
