Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
