He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
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