this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
