he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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