Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
