Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
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