Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
