you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
of course. lets lasso hookers.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
cat food counts as protein by the way
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Randomize
