K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize