Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize