so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
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