every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
