Buhtt sex?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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