this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Randomize