your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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