While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.