i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.