Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
