I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
