Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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