No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
