i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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