absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
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