North Korea, Best Korea!
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Randomize
