I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
